art-tastic

move

Fri, 26 Jun 2009 06:36:19 GMT

I'm moving my blogging business to WordPress. I've loved LJ, but WordPress provides features for free that I'm paying a lot of money for on here. Also, I'm in a new phase of my life, and I feel like I need a new blog to go with it. Too much of my Philadelphia life is wrapped up in here, to the point where it's too suffocating to post anything. My new blog will be drawings/artings ONLY. I guess I've just come to a place where I don't want my personal life to be on the internet anymore. It's kind of a sad feeling, because I've loved working on this blog and sharing my life with these wonderful people. To my steady readers: please, let's stay in touch, and I would love to still share my artwork with you on the new website.

Click on the banner below:

Spring layout

Mon, 13 Apr 2009 17:13:19 GMT

And we're a pretty butter-cream yellow for Spring! Thanks estiloamor for the lovely layout!

Hay ladies, are you RAPE PROOF?

Mon, 13 Apr 2009 16:26:53 GMT

Jarring question, isn't it? Filled with guilt, blame, self-doubt... The title of Leanor Vivanco’s article in the Tribune's Red Eye, "Are You Mug Proof," is a little too close to home, and considering the content of the article, he might as well have been only talking about rape. (Only one paragraph of the entire article is geared towards Dudes, the rest is an exhausting list of things one should do to not look victim-ish.)

I know, I know, this was in the paper a couple of weeks ago, but it's taken me a little while to articulate why this article, and ones like it, make me so angry. When someone in my women's lit class brought it up I was nearly foaming with rage, and I decided to figure out exactly why these little lists of Dos and Don'ts of the Daily Commute (OR OMGZ U MIGHT GET RAPED OR SUMTHIN!!1) are so offensive.

The photo accompanying the article depicts a young girl wearing headphones, texting on her cell-phone, and carrying her backpack; she’s just like any other girl on her way home from school. But in the photograph there are targets pointed on her, displaying all of the things she is doing wrong. “Your behavior could be putting you at risk to be a criminal's next victim,” Vivanco says. He then rambles a list of things one should not do, or look like, when walking down a Chicago street. Don’t put your hands in your pockets. Don’t listen to headphones. Don’t talk on your phone. “Appearing distracted or drunk can increase a person's chances of becoming a crime target,” he writes. Great. Now, not only do I have to worry about actually being drunk in public: I get to worry about whether or not I look drunk in public (which, I am sure, is most of the time).

Your behavior could be putting you at risk to be a criminal's next victim. From line one, I already feel like I am being chastised by an overbearing uncle who wants to make sure that I’m not one of “those girls.” I am instantly reminded of a seminar that was held at my dorm when I was living on the University of Pennsylvania’s campus in west Philadelphia—a city known more for its high crime rate than its Brotherly Love. It was mandatory that all of the freshman females attend; the attendance of the boys was not required. A hardened Philly cop went up to the podium and assured us that we all—each and every one of us “young ladies”—was a potential rape victim any time we left our dorm. He then also had his own little pet list of behaviors that make one a potential victim, including wearing one’s hair in a ponytail. “This gives the perpetrator a perfect opportunity to grab your hair and render you immobile,” he said. There was also a time when flyers were passed around campus warning us not to wear white sneakers, because a local serial rapist was attacking women who wore them. If a ponytail and my gym shoes make me more tempting to a perpetrator, why should I even leave my house?

Instead of making me feel more prepared or assured that I am doing the right things to keep myself safe, this article only makes me worried for new victims. There is already so much victim-blaming, especially towards young women. I can just imagine what I would hear from that same uncle had I been mugged on any given evening. Peering over his glasses, I’m sure he would have a whole list of questions for me. “Well, why were you alone? What made you think you could take that route home? And you were wearing that outfit; what did you think would happen? Were your hands in your pockets? That makes you look vulnerable, you know.” It angers me that it seems women have to bear more responsibility for what happens to them than the actual criminals do for their own actions.

What irritates me the most—and perhaps, what is the most offensive aspect of this entire line of thinking—is that the article, just like the seminar, is almost singularly directed at women. Where were the young men, and what were they doing, while I had to sit and be lectured in a stuffy auditorium for two hours? Frolicking in a field of daisies? Why don’t we lasso up all of the freshmen gentlemen and hold a seminar about why they should not rape, mug, or harm other people, and give them a list of what makes them vulnerable to becoming a criminal? We don’t do that because it would simply be ridiculous and counter-productive to create a society where all young men consider themselves to be potential perpetrators, and I think it’s just as ridiculous to live in a world where every young woman is a potential victim. And how about the fact that, actually, the average life-span of a young black man born in Chicago is 25? Statistically speaking, more young men are dying in Chicago every day...many more than women. Chicago has an insanely high homicide and gang-crime rate, but instead of telling young men how to be safer in the city, the Red Eye would prefer that Chicago's gentlemen would "Man Up" a little bit.

But, at the same time, I can’t blame Vivanco. I grew up in Rogers Park; there are worse neighborhoods in Chicago to be a teenage woman, but “The RP” was no picnic. My sister and I often joke that the one thing we learned the best in the Chicago Public Schools was to run home, very, very fast. I know that the reality is that street crime is a problem in Chicago, and most of those crimes happen to young women. I know we can’t all just hold hands, sing “Kumbaya,” and expect everything to be okay. Vivanco, I’m sure, just wants to make us girls aware of what is happening around us. Trust me. We are all too aware. If Vivanco knew all of the decisions I make in my day that are created out of fear of rape—-what I wear, where I go, how I get there, who I go with, even who I accept food from—-and if he could hear the catcalls, the taunts, and experience the fear that most city-women experience from age twelve and upward, maybe he would make a list of things men can do to make sure women feel more comfortable on their walk home from work. Shut your mouth, don’t walk so close behind me, and don’t call at me from your car are all a great start.

contracted to illustrate a graphic novel

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 23:08:34 GMT

Well, I have my first art job: a writer, Matt Cronin, has contracted me to illustrate his graphic novel, Out Past The Bright Lights. In order to create reader interest, we've decided to put it the sketches online and then re-release in color when it's published. Updates are every Friday, so add it to your bookmarks and enjoy!

I met Matt in a coffee shop, and he told me that he had just finished writing a novel and gave me a copy to read. I fell in love with the story and read it over five times through. As wonderful as his story is, I felt like something was missing. Matt knew exactly what I was talking about, and he had already hatched a plan. One day he said he wanted to meet with me for coffee. When I got to the cafe, he ploped a Wacom tablet in my lap and told me it was mine...if I'd illustrate the story as a graphic novel. Of course my instant answer was yes. I had been living in a kind of desperate art-limbo in the months after I left PAFA, and this was just the sort of thing I needed to get myself drawing again. So, we drew up a contract and got to work.

This is a huge project. It's taken months of planning to get this far. Matt and I have had meetings once or twice a week since October, and he even flew me out to Portland, Maine. The story is set there, and I couldn't very well draw a place that I had never been to. We flew out there together and also took day trips to Boston and Providence. You can see photos of our trip here on Facebook.

Go go go check it out!

Out Past the Bright Lights

Anyway, sorry I haven't posted on here for a while. I decided to lay low for a while because I thought for my safety and sanity it might do well to not give certain people quite so much access to me through the internet, but now that I'm going to have a pretty public internet presence professionally anyway, I figure I might as well start blogging again.

striving to live a more creative life

Thu, 18 Dec 2008 17:24:47 GMT

I've neglected this blog for a while... Things were happening in my life that I didn't particularly feel like sharing with the world, and I set my art aside for a little bit. I had to let life happen to me for a little while and surrender control, instead of pretending like I knew what to do. But now with everything looking fresh and white and clean around me, I feel ready for a new start.

I'm actually surprised how the cold and the wind makes me feel raw inside, like I'm being cleaned out. It's a good feeling. I wasn't expecting to have such an emotional reaction to experiencing winter in Chicago again, but it's bringing back to me everything that I love about being home, being here. The other day it was six degrees Farenheit, and I felt so fearless and wild. Bring it on. I wish it was like this all year.

So, to correspond with this nice new clean feeling, we have a nice new clean design by bzzinglikeneon of circa77. Isn't it lovely?

um...yeah.

Mon, 03 Nov 2008 16:16:42 GMT

Okay. So, this is kind of ridiculous and embarrassing, but Katie and I are going to go meet Hanson this afternoon and I'm kind of insanely excited. Katie and I have loved Hanson ever since we were 10. I can't really explain it. As I told my friend, Mike, it's like a cantankerous pustule on our dear little hearts that never went away. Even during our rebellious/snobby more-punk-rock-than-thou teen years Katie and I had our Hanson t-shirts stuffed under our bed. In my pre-teen days, I used to associate them with an insane hormone rush and lots--LOTS--of squealing. But now when I listen to them it just reminds me of the awesome bond that I have with Katie, and how fun-painful-scary-amazing it was to be twelve once. And yes, maybe I still do eek out a squeal... but I try to keep the decibel level down.

sketchbook pages

Fri, 24 Oct 2008 23:53:54 GMT

drawing boys

Thu, 02 Oct 2008 06:18:41 GMT

Doodle of me and my new... "speshul friend." Hey. What's the point of having all this ability if it doesn't get ya laid? For real. Boys like chicks with skills. Numchuck skills... Crossbow skills... Crosshatching skills...

heavenly scene of mind, or could be hell...oh.

Wed, 01 Oct 2008 18:03:04 GMT

Fall is here. I love how chilly and gray and steely Chicago gets. And it happens so quickly... One day, it's 75, the next day it's 50 and you're looking under your bed for your long-johns.

I'm in between jobs right now, which is pretty amazing. It's a privilege to be able to walk all day long during my favorite time in this city. Nothing is more full of anticipation, melancholy, clarity, and wonder than being on the brink of autumn in Chicago.

Music for walking, sipping, and trains:

Dandy Warhols at the Vic

Sun, 14 Sep 2008 16:40:55 GMT

One of the coolest things about living with Katie in this apartment is that I am literally a 20 minute walk from everything: the Metro, the Vic, Double Door, Abbey Pub... You name it, and I can get there in less than half an hour.

This Friday I had a bit of the rainy blues. I had also barely left the apartment all week, so I was a little cage crazy. Around 7:45 I looked online to see if anything cool was going on, and sure enough, the Dandy Warhols were playing at the Vic at 8:00. I called the box office to see if they were sold out yet, and the lady on the phone said, "No, but there are only about 30 tickets left, and they're going fast! You'd better get here quick!" I grabbed my room-mate Drue and we made a break for it; got there in less than ten minutes. When we got to the ticket window, they only had six tickets left. Literally minutes after we walked in the door, the show started.

And it was AWESOME!

Click here to read a review and see some cool photos over at TheDeadHub.com

but all the cool girls are doing it...

Thu, 11 Sep 2008 21:21:16 GMT

Natalie Dylan is selling her virginity to pay for grad school. Yes, you heard me right.

Selling her virginity.

To pay for grad school.

Oh, but it's so empowering to women! And it's for a noble cause: to pay for her education to become a marriage counselor. Hey! Natalie! Teach a couple undergrad courses and your tuition is waived, batbrain.

Actually, the joke is on me. Too bad I lost my virginity at 14. If I had been smart like Natalie and stayed a virgin so that I could later auction it to some anonymous balding creep-o, I wouldn't have wasted all that time worrying about my GPA, or Stafford Loans. Silly me! Oh, wait, I can still sell my body like every other girl in art school and be a stripper... But selling your virginity is so much more classy. Klassy with a "k," that is.

Woohoo, go Natalie. You're really doing your part to empower women. ::head-desk::

it's easy to see, just a matter of time 'til it shows...

Wed, 10 Sep 2008 16:39:21 GMT

Despite the circumstances, I have to admit that living with Katie is pretty awesome. We're doing what we've always wanted to do ever since we were little girls: sharing an apartment within a walking distance of the Pick-Me-Up, doing our art, and spoiling a kitty. And the guys that we live with are amazing. Even though I don't want a boyfriend right now, it's very nice to live with constant male company. They are wonderful young men, and I love them.

(click image to view a larger version)

Aaaaaaaand I finished a painting! It's really difficult to get a good photo of a painting, so I'm waiting until Dad can come over to snap it. Professional photog poppas can be so handy!

Ladies and Gentlemen, meet Miss Emma Monkey. (kitten video!)

Fri, 05 Sep 2008 23:14:40 GMT

Katie and I figured out precisely what our little community needed.

Happiness.

Today I gave Patrick Swayze a muffin!

Wed, 20 Aug 2008 01:47:41 GMT

Okay, so this is kind of mundane, I know, but it TOTALLY MADE MY DAY.

Today started like any other day at the Cafe At The Cultural Center... until I went to go get ice for the icebox. There, in the loading dock, smoking a cigarette, was PATRICK SWAYZE! Aparently he was filming the pilot for The Beast on the Washington Ave. steps and in Preston Bradley Hall. I had no idea what to say, so I just moved along and got my ice (plus I wasn't entirely sure that it was him). Then, later on, the cafe was pretty busy but I really, really needed to pee, so I made a B-line for the staff bathroom. Because I didn't want to leave my co-worker swarmed by herself (and because of my own urgency), I was walking very fast and was not looking where I was going. Well, I nearly knocked the poor man over. I could only manage a "Yo, Swayze! Sorry!" over my shoulder as I continued my gait. Then... I saw him AGAIN as I was closing down the cafe and taking everything down to the kitchen. I was passing through the dock again, and he was smoking another cigarette. I asked him if he wanted a muffin. He was very pleased, and picked out a banana nut muffin. He said, "Woah, heavy muffin!" I then made my way to the kitchen, closed the cafe, and skipped home.

In honor of Sarah's Swayze Muffin Day, here is my favorite part of my favorite Swayze movie: To Wong Foo: Thanks for Everything! Love, Julie Newmar.

This is why I loooove working at the Cultural Center! Two celebrities in one month! Riann Wilson was there last Tuesday.

Beach!!!

Mon, 28 Jul 2008 18:15:24 GMT

Katie and I went to the beach yesterday! Oh Chicago, how I adore you!!!

More photos here!

Edit:Katie made me delete all of the pictures of her. Boooo!

"Message me if you want to further your career at McDonalds, " and more in this week's installment

Mon, 28 Jul 2008 04:48:43 GMT

Yes, there is a lot more going on in my life than online dating. However, nothing makes me lunge for the blog like a Crap E-mail From A Dude. They're just so compelling. It's like a trainwreck full of clowns; you don't want to look, but you can't look away, and you don't know whether to laugh or scream. But this one really, REALLY takes the cake. Mr. Love Machine starts off with a classic pick-up... insulting my name.

Hey Little miss sarahedythe

Either you’re just using that name to hide from the police, or your parent’s were awful cruel to you. Anyway, you’ve probably gotten a few dozen e-mails from losers who are freshly divorced from their 8th wife, have 5 bratty kids, a sexy picture of an overly-hairy back on their profile, and who just got promoted to flipping burgers at McDonalds. Either that, or you’re being hit on the by the geriatrics who discovered the Internet and Metamucil at the same time and are feeling as virile as a twenty year old.

Well, I’m not going to spend too much time talking about myself, but I’m good looking, muscular, funny, exciting, adventurous, cool, a real man’s man—the kind of man other men want to be, and women want to be with! But most of all, out of everything else, my best trait is…I’m modest. ; )

So if you’re looking to further your career at McDonalds, or think that Liver Spots are really, really hot, then I’m not the guy for you. But if you want to meet up and have a great time and some great conversation, then we should get together. If you think you can handle it, that is!

Talk soon,

Tony

I'm so glad that you feel you can raise my station in life. Further my career at McDonalds! You are SO GENEROUS to spend an entire paragraph insulting me, and then make such an offer when I am obviously not worthy. Of anything. And of course attractive young men couldn't POSSIBLY be interested in me, because apparently I have a dorky name.

"I have money down that you want to be my friend ," and other gems from smarmy online dating.

Thu, 17 Jul 2008 11:44:01 GMT

Wow. All of the "special" guys are doing online dating now. I was starting to feel like maybe talking to guys on the internet would be easier than talking to them in real life, because... you know... dudes are scary. But boy, it sure seems like the internet is just a forum for a dude to be an ASS. Wonderful. However, some of it is really hilarious, like this message that I got today and had to share with you guys:

Dear Ms sara with an h,

Hopefully this makes it through the deluge of emails you are getting from, lord only knows, hotter boys than I. Because I really want to talk about The man who was Thursday. I just finished it. And it blew like ad hominem attacks. How can it be one of your fav? books. Or even in the top ten?

The fat man is God. Like for real. What? Fuck you GK Chesterton Chokes on Dick.

Art majors never fall in love with me but sometimes they become my friend. So... if you are into making a friend, and your profile would lead me to believe you are, than I'm down for trying to facilitate that happening. (And have money down that it would be a happening.)

your rather random,
-dan

Wow buddy. REALLY great way to initiate "friendship" with me. We've already established your superior taste and your upper hand in the verbal abuse of our very short friendship. Saying "fuck you" is just... so charming. So overwhelmingly intriguing! Oh God! I feel myself being sucked in against my will! Oh, I must be friends with you, I must! And I can tell by your easily slung insults, bad grammar, and inferior syntax that you really wish to facilitate friendship.

Oh, Lawd.

Happee music...is happee.

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 16:53:43 GMT

Optimism. I lack it. But these songs are full of happy!

My friend Christian is in this band. He plays the piano. I think this song expresses his playful and darling spirit. As you can imagine, he totally has a baby face. Whenever I hear this song it reminds me of the time that Skybox came out to Philadelphia while they were on a brief East Coast tour. I had just moved to Philly and I was terribly lonely, but these guys played at the Khyber and I was sosososososo happy to see some familiar faces. It was so much fun because there were only three people in the audience, including myself, and it was like they were putting on their own personal show for me. That night they all slept on my dorm suite floor. It was one of the coolest weekends of my life.

Oh, Rufus. You make my life one big fantastic gay musical. Thank you.

This song may not be work safe/niece safe, so use headphones! When listening to this song, one must stand in the middle of the livingroom and spin around, and around, and around, until one collapses in the middle of the floor in a fit of giggles. Convincing one's sister and roommates to do the same is surprisingly easy.

What the hell, dudes are scary.

Sat, 05 Jul 2008 17:12:39 GMT

It is really, really weird to interact with guys again. After two years of not even looking at dudes, I have no idea how to talk to them. "Um...hi. You're really cute, so I thought I'd say hi and ohmygodjesusfuckingchristIamlonely." I want to talk to them. They smile at me, and I can tell that they want me to talk to them. I've been dressing up and doing my hair again (!) because I would like some attention, but as soon as a guy walks up to me all I can manage is, "Uuuuuh... hey." I didn't think I'd be doing this again. I thought I'd found the guy, and we were going to move in together and tra-la-la, and take it from there. Dating again wasn't in the picture. My shrink and friends agree that I should "get out there and have some fun," but I have to really force myself to do so. Katie's roommates help, seeing as they are both guys and I don't find them completely terrifying. The other night I was really upset and they walked me to the beach. They were my midnight lakefront chaperones. It was really sweet.

The rest of my stuff was picked up by my co-worker today, and I felt a release like pushing off of the bottom of a pool to break the surface and breathe. There are no more attatchments. It is officially over. Completely over. This not the way I thought things would be.

another hole in my head

Wed, 02 Jul 2008 22:26:56 GMT

I'm starting to get to a point where I can get attention from males and it doesn't make me feel like sobbing. I'm pretty sure this is a good thing...? A start? I hope so. My job is definitely helping. It helps to have a schedule, to have to be out of bed and presentable at a certain time, and then to spend most of my day surrounded by people; not so much having to interact with them, but just making them coffee.

Katie and I went to go get our noses pierced before she left for Italy. Now we are more twin-like.

And yes, for the record, I am completely freaking out.

no stress girl, you deserve the best

Sat, 28 Jun 2008 17:48:54 GMT

I'm on Katie's deck lathered in sunscreen with sun-in making me blonder, Jane Austen making me warmer, caffeine making me quicker, and a mint/rose flavored hookah making me softer. The sun is out, the radio is on, and I bought a hot (with a H-A-W-T) pink bikini to show off my thickness. I'm starting to feel a little better. While this has been a mournful time, it's quickly becoming a celebration of my sisterhood with Katie. She has been such a rock right now, and when I am around her it is hard to pine for someone who obviously had nothing deeper than a shallow affair with the reflection of himself that I gave him. Now he may affect feelings of pain, in the same way that he convinced himself that he had feelings for me, but his charade is transparent. He only wishes to elicit a response from me and pity from others, because of his need to fuel his pathological narcissism. I can hardly mourn the loss of such a person... In fact, I have reason to celebrate that it ended so quickly, and that he only stole two years of my life instead of ten. He was kind to me only as long as it reflected kindly on him, and that is no loss.

self-cutting linked to risky teen sex

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 02:46:25 GMT

This article has invaded my doodle-brain today: Self-Cutting Linked To Risky Teen Sex Study Shows Risky Sexual Behavior Reported More Often Among Frequent Self-Cutters - CBS News. As I read one paragraph after another, my heart sank. Great. Yet another useless and lazy dialogue that alienates self-mutilators and points them out as "bad, bad wreckless girls," instead of actually exploring the REAL issue: the fact that risky behavior is a symptom of depression, period, and many young teens turn to cutting and sexual promiscuity as a means of establishing emotional control over their roller-coaster lives. I wish I could go in a time machine to visit my Teenage Self and tell her that she is beautiful and special, that there is no one in the world like her; I'd assure her that if she just hangs in there, in only a couple of years from now she will be an artist in her own apartment with two cats and a guy that matters. I'd tell her that the only way she can engage in life and in everything around her is to be her best lover, to give herself--without shame--the love that she tries to pull out from other people.

vintage family

Thu, 05 Jun 2008 15:25:33 GMT

I'm back home for a visit, and I found these AMAAAAZING family photos in my dad's apartment. Had to share.

Dad, circa 1960.

Extended family in Sunland, California.

My grandma, Frieda, who I met when I was tiny, but I have no recollection of her.

This is the Unknown Aunt. Her name is (was?) Betty-Jo. She ran away from home when she was 16, so I don't know very much about her.

Waaaaaaaaal E!

Wed, 28 May 2008 03:56:27 GMT

Okay, guys. I am REEEALLY EXCITED about this movie. With all of the crap that's been showing these days, it's been a very long time since I've anticipated a release date this much. Wall E appears to intertwine four of my favorite things: science fiction, robots, robot love, and little digital squealy voices! Let's hope it doesn't disappoint, yes? I can't remember a movie trailer that I've wanted to watch over and over again, just because it is SO DARN KYOOT.

And then watching the trailer led Stephen and I down a wonderful yellow-brick-road through YouTube of cute robot videos, and we found this guy Crabfu! His creations are almost as cute as Wall E him(it?)self.

So we all know that the Japanese pretty much monopolize the business that is adorable-ness. But the Keepon robot, developed by Hideki Kozima, is more than just a friendly ball of animated yellow foam. Keepon was made to interact with small children to study developmental disorders in schools and remedial centers. I wish research was always this cute! He kinda reminds me of Rollie Pollie Olie.

The ApriPoco is a universal control for everything from light switches to changing TV channels.

Sony's Rolly digital music player not only dances to the music playing, but you can choreograph the moves with movement software! Insane!

little bird

Tue, 27 May 2008 15:34:57 GMT